Breathe

Some of us are bearing our crosses with grace. Some are in constant battles with weariness. Others are desperately holding on by a thread. The problem is, we’re doing it incognito — and if our story is concealed for too long, our identities eventually become buried along with it.

Let me explain.

Yesterday, I shared a bit of my story about my journey after leaving corporate America. Toward the end of my time with that employer, through the emotional and mental anguish I experienced, God taught me many lessons — but one in particular has become my mantra. I don’t believe I’ll ever forget the moment I heard God speak those six words to me:

“You don’t have to take this!”

He knew exactly what to say and when to say it, because I knew exactly what He meant. With no questions asked, I allowed those words to minister to my heart and mind. I remembered the many years I spent in corporate America and how I stayed in most jobs far longer than I should have. I realized I stayed simply because I could — not because God needed me to — but because I could.

I used to bear the weight, “fight the good fight,” attempting to be a good soldier in the army of the Lord. I never wanted to leave anything unfinished. I wanted to learn and do everything I needed to before my exodus. What I failed to realize in those days is that God trusted me. He trusted my heart and mind in that season. He believed in me. He knew I would choose His wisdom over the wisdom of this world.

But I didn’t.

That’s why I stayed in places — and relationships — longer than I should have. Those words broke something in me: old cycles, old mindsets, and old patterns. They opened my eyes to see me… for a change. I could finally see the woman God needed me to see. I acknowledged and accepted her growth, her maturity, and her heart for God.

That is how and why I can face giants or anything contrary to my destiny and tell it: “I don’t have to take this!”

And for the things God has called me to carry, I know I am covered.

I have control — not over my entire life, but over what He has given me to carry. I know how to limit myself and draw boundaries that support my progression and protect my oil, my gifts, and my purpose.

Today, I have restraint because I am developing disciplines around the areas I need to grow stronger in. I am devoted to time with God, committed to spiritual growth, and aligning my heart with His daily. Peeling back the layers isn’t always easy, but God’s love carries me when it gets too tough. The weight I carry belongs to me, but life belongs to Him. He has my back and my front. He covers every aspect of my life.

With Him, I can breathe.